Music by Owl City.

Correcting an error from episode 10. 

Everyone was making so much noise. 

Music by Commix. 

Redux with Meredith! Music by Caravan Palace. 

Brought to you by musical guest, edIT. 

Boy do I feel awful, I should be fired. I might be fired if I have another day like today; maybe I’ll even quit. I work for a small research facility that got their hands on one of those supercomputers. I’m an “Internal Operations Technician,” which actually means I operate the “On/Off” switches for several hundred panels. Having the switches toggled a certain way determines how the computer operates. The machine requires nearly a hundred of us, and flipping each switch at precisely the right moment is not a task that can be taken lightly or with any ease.

The scientists work on complex mathmatical equations and run them through the supercomputer with different configurations of paths. If they want a particular junction to switch from being on to off, a small light next to the switch lights up. It’s then our job to flip the switch, which then turns the light off. It seems like it wouldn’t be a problem, but some days the lights are going on and off so fast, and the lights are sometimes closer to the wrong switch … it can be a nightmare.

Today was one of the biggest catastrophes I’ve ever seen. The scientists were running an experiment with some dangerous chemical and running data through the supercomputer to determine how to handle the heat or corrosiveness of the chemical as it changed over the course of the experiment. If the results came back that the chemical was too dangerous, they would have to shut down the experiment immediately; no pressure, right?

Well I went into sort of a trance I guess, and totally missed 10 or 12 bit flips. Screwed up some AND gates, an OR gate or two and several packets of data along the way. They scientists got back the data that the chemical was overly toxic; more tocix than they had prepared for, and they paniced. Mayham rained down on this experiment as fast as bits get switched every day. Two guys came running down the stairs telling everyone to evacuate. We heard a crash; one of the scientists abandoned the chemical and it spilled all over their workstation. Red alerts and alarms went off, people were screaming left and right … I was scared.

After everyone got out, some guys in protective suits went in and reported there was no danger, and that if the chemical had given off toxic fumes before, it had stopped doing it now. The scientists figured out there had never been a problem, that someone (thank goodness they didn’t find out who) had just messed up a few gates, after a few tests they did. There was about an hour left in the work day, so we were all just allowed to go home early while the scientists rebuild the experiment for tomorrow.

I think I’ll call in sick tomorrow.

There have been rampent rumors of Project Cubase since there was a leak in early 2006. As director of the project, I have decided to finally go public on a few of the details, or order to clear up misconceptions the public may have on the purpose of this project. Let us begin with the Rickhtor Machine.

The Rickhtor Machine (invented and patented by Seth Rickhtor) is a simple computer program that has three two variable and an output. The first variable, know as D, is any positive two digit integer, which represents the number of dimensions passed. The second variable (usually referred to as M, for “matter”) can be passed in several different ways. The beauty of the Rickhtor Machine (RM) is its flexibility in coorinating data passed by M with the number provided in D. M can be passed as an physical object, the passage of time, a scent or sound, and even things more abstract, like a package of data depicting complex non-real structures.

The output of the RM can also be expressed in more than one way, but the most accurate representation we’ve found has been in sound. The higher the coordination M has with D, the truer the sound, or harmonic ressonance, that is produced by RM. For example, if a three-dimensional object is passed as M, and “3″ is entered as D, a perfect harmonic ressonance is produced.

While experimenting with the RM, we came accross a data packet we had used in a previous experiment in the 80’s to create a more challenging version of the rubix cube. Unfortunately, the only shape we could come up with that would be satifyingly challanging was unreal, and could not actually be made. This left the object in the form of a data packet with undefined bounds. When we entered this packet as M, and started with “3″ as D, we got very strange results. Usually entering non real objects and shapes as M when D is 3 produces a flatline hum or static. The data packet in this case produced a high-pitched buzzing noise that fluctuated in pitch.

Naturally, we were intrigued by this irregularity. The data packet had always been something of a mystery to us (as it was unfinished), so we breifly revived LTRP #6929 (the 80’s project). After a few slight modifications and refinements to the packet, we tried entering it into the RM again, multiple times. Each time we entered the packet in for M, we used a sequentially higher number for D. I must admit, I was hoping for the result we got, but I did not expect it. Each D got us closer to harmonic ressonance as we approached what we finally realized was the dimension our data packet existed in: 22.

Immediately we formed a new Long-Term Research Project and hailed it as “the basis for cubic and quantium exploration,” quoth Dr. Phillip Striver. That quote was shortened to the word “Cubase” which is now what the project is known by. The project itself it two-fold; one half of our scientists on the project try to actuallize the data packet of the cubase into a means of understanding in 3 dimension, in order to gain access to the 22nd dimension. The other half try to find other means into discovering the 22nd dimension, in order to view and use the Cubase as some sort of vehical of dimensinoal transport. At NO TIME was there any discussion of using the data from the project as a weapon, such a claim is preposterous, and not even possible with the knowledge we possess now.

This is the bulk of what I have been given permission to release, but I will say just a few more things about the purpose of Project Cubase. The Cubase MAY OR MAY NOT be able to be used to do any of the following things: travel distances at speeds previously thought impossible, instantanious travel, time-travel, interplanetary travel, interdimensional travel, perpetual energy, and highly-dense matter (more dense than black holes).

None of the above uses have been confirmed, and all are being tested. If you would like to donate or help out with Project Cubase, my email is saiontz@grunchbox.com.